The summer season has ended and this fashion snob has spent the last few days saying teary goodbyes to her summer wardrobe. Summer tanks turn to polyester polos, linen skirts turn to khaki, and cute beach totes turn to… backpacks. If there were ever a more dangerous game! A gorgeous uniform pairing can be made or broken by such a simple, mandatory accessory. And now, during back-to-school shopping season, you definitely don’t want to miss this crucial assessment. Be prepared — this diva’s got a lot of opinions to share.
Dagne Dover
There’s no denying you are 1000% chic. Soft neoprene with a sleek pocket, a snazzy jumbo zipper, and effortlessly round form — this backpack is the queen of backpacks. While I sometimes wonder if you struggle to fit everything into your bags, those who pull this backpack off without making it look like a poorly-stuffed dumpling are the real supermodels of this school! One of the best things about this backpack is that it is both ergonomic and stylish. That’s a really hard combination to execute! Instead of dragging this backpack at your butt, you can wear it higher up — like a normal person — and stay classy.
Jansport
A classic. Every high school TV show features at least one of these backpacks, making it the perfect symbol of the teenage experience. I might be biased because I currently use a Jansport, but these backpacks are dependable, cute, and perfect for school. They have extra pockets but don’t look bulky; a clean, soft leather logo patch on the front; sturdy straps; and, bonus, a rip-proof layer of leather on the bottom. When it comes to Jansport, you’ll practically never have a day when your backpack feels too full. My favorite part about Jansport backpacks is their diverse color palette. I’m partial to navy blue, but everyone becomes a work of art with colors like silky green, pale yellow, and sky blue. You can’t go wrong with one of these babies!
High Sierra
What in God’s name are you doing carrying that monstrosity around? We’re at school, not climbing Mt. San Jacinto! Jansport was functional, yeah, but this is a bit excessive, don’t you think? If you carry this backpack, you’re either very responsible or blind to aesthetics — and I’ve yet to see someone pull this look off. Hats off to anyone who does! This backpack is bulky with sooo many pockets and unnecessarily large and bright zippers… What are you even stuffing in those pockets? Snacks? Overdue library books? Crumpled worksheets? My thinning patience? Dude, I’m glad you’re well-prepared, but we’re not heading into the apocalypse quite yet. Unless you’re going for camper-chic, save this backpack for when you’re in your forties, looking after your kids on a field trip, or solo hiking in the woods.
Roller Backpacks
Um… so I thought we left these behind in fourth grade. Because that’s the last time I owned one of these and the last time I remember thinking they were cool. Maybe you’re a senior finding a kindergarten backpack for the year, for which case, this could be a cute callback to your childhood. But I still have to ask: why? Functionality-wise, roller backpacks are the worst design to have on a 6-12th grade campus with lots of stairs and narrow walkways. Two flimsy wheels that make your backpack flip and flop behind you like a fish; you always have to stop by the stairs, push down the handle, and lug it up. Do you know just how many times I’ve almost trampled your books last year? Do yourself a favor this year and ditch the wheels. 🙂
Yeah… so that’s it for now. Happy start of school!
