There’s nothing a fashion enthusiast enjoys more than a spoonful of controversy in her morning coffee, especially when it’s about the most necessary clothing item of all: bottoms. Walking around the halls at Bishop’s, you’ll find all kinds of pristine clothing items that scream “privilege,” but none more talked about than a scandalous little skirt! Can you believe they almost tried taking them away? I’m glad they didn’t, because they’re just too prominent for me not to write about! So, I suggest you buckle up, folks.
It’s really hard to compete with a good khaki skort. It’s not too poofy, folds nicely under your polo when you roll it (not saying I roll my skirt *cough*), and matches with almost every color of sweatshirt, sweater, or polo. Every good outfit starts with the basics, and a khaki skort is my definition of a staple. But, I must make a confession — I’m definitely cheating when I say “skort.” Because the best way to wear these is with the shorts cut out. So, it’s really just a skirt I wear over another pair of spandex. Listen, if you wanna keep the attached shorts, rolling them up might be a relatively painful option… but if not, they’re knee-length, so I know Ms. Shea definitely approves! I don’t. Cut the shorts. 🙂
No. Absolutely not. See, I judge skirts based on two consistent factors: pattern and cut. Why do khaki skorts work well? They have a versatile pattern and color with a flattering cut. A safe cut that doesn’t fly with the wind. Pleated skirts — khaki or, ugh, plaid — are more dangerous. It’s a disappointing level of poofy and easily flips upward. When you roll it, it looks like you’re wearing a pool donut around your waist or you’ve just gotten home from an all-you-can-eat buffet. But that boxy navy blue and green plaid pattern is just sooo versatile. And pleating (aka ruining) a perfectly straight grid is totally not a knife to my heart. Give me a break, people!
That’s not a typo. I’m a firm believer in normalizing khaki pants in the girls’ uniform, especially when it gets cold. People come to school on free dress days wearing pants, so what makes khakis different? Look, I understand the aversion to Land’s End khakis — they remind me of wrinkly, uncomfortable skinny jeans. Since when have we counted on this brand to make anything look cute? But… oh my god… if Land’s End doesn’t have them, where can I even get khakis?! I don’t know, every mall across America? The internet? My favorite khakis are low-rise, wide-leg pants from Ann Taylor that are lighter in color than Land’s End’s. And in a five-second Google search, I found this pair from American Eagle. I love my skirts, but I intend to preserve my knees and joints for old age instead of freezing them off now.
Okay, okay, I know I said khaki pants, but sweatpants are just a huge step too far in the wrong direction! It’s way too uncoordinated. An elegant polo with the same sweats you wore during a four-hour nap on the couch? Wearing a four-day old trash bag as a dress with a Birkin bag on your arm makes the same amount of sense. You might as well just roll out of bed and wear your pajamas to school! But… I am a sucker for sweats. On free dress days, it’s a comfortable option for chilly weather or when you can’t be bothered to put together a proper outfit. That’s why Ms. Shea gives us all those Cozy Free Dress days! And as for your outfit, you don’t even have to think — it’s a uniform. No excuses. If you somehow mixed up the two, I’m guessing you were just lazier than I expected and threw on the first things you saw, or you got creative… and it didn’t work.
That’s it for now! Till next time 🙂
